Wedding Wednesday: Thank You Notes

Wedding Wednesday: Thank You Notes

The two great dictums of being a “Williams daughter” are to wear sunblock and to always, always write thank you notes promptly. A sunburn or a missed thank you note in our family trumps any other offense.

So now that the influx of wedding gifts has officially started, I’ve been pumping out thank you notes like a machine. I have seven to mail today alone. At this rate, I’m going to run out of stationary in about two weeks.

The Met’s correspondence card collection is a good way to stock up. For $22, you get 25 classic gold embossed cards with matching envelopes. I ordered two sets of the design that is currently on clearance for only $5.

(PS: My hairstylist was telling me about her friend who was married four months ago, is already pregnant, planning a baby shower and has still not mailed out her wedding thank you notes. This almost sent me into a coma. I know life is busy, but thank you cards are a piece of cake. If – heaven forbid – you fall into this category, do me a solid and write your thank you’s tonight.)

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There are 16 comments for this article
  1. Jenna at 4:18 pm

    I have to confess that designing my thank you notes is one of the wedding related tasks I am most excited about! I am constantly ordering cute cards off of etsy. There is just something so beautiful about sending and receiving handwritten notes to/from people.

  2. Lyndsy at 4:50 pm

    I have already sent 50+ thank you letters and still have at least 20+ to write. I agree about poor taste to wait too long. Staying on top of them all though is a bit overwhelming especailly when I try to personalize them all to each specific guest. Good luck with yours!

  3. Fig at 5:04 pm

    At the risk of killing you instantly, I have to confess that I never sent mine.


    There is a special place in hell for me, I know it.

  4. Jenny at 5:16 pm

    I just found some in my husband’s work bag that he apparently never sent. ARRRRR. Especially since we just bought a house and I sent change of address notes to them. How embarrassing, they got those and not thank you cards from our wedding in November. Typical-hubby didn’t think anything wrong about it.

  5. mrsem Author at 5:19 pm

    Oh Fig! Mail them this week. It’s never too late. Imagine how surprised and happy people would be to get a thank you after all this time.

  6. loren weltsch at 6:05 pm

    i completely agree…thank you notes are so important. a little note can go a long way in letting people know how much you appreciate their gift.

  7. katek at 6:29 pm

    Gah! Yes!!

    One of the best gifts I got around wedding time was a birthday gift soon after I got engaged; personalized correspondence cards. I ran through all 50 in short order and ordered a set with my new name as soon as I was married. For the wedding thank you notes (I used the name cards for shower gifts, people who were being just lovely and helpful, etc.) I had stationary with the same pattern as our designer put on our invites. My mother encouraged me to get them printed without “thank you” on them, brilliantly, since I still have loads of them and they’re great multi-purpose cards!

    We wrote thank you notes as we received gifts, and then split up the notes for things we got right at wedding time and knocked them out each doing a couple a day on our honeymoon. Doesn’t sound romantic but we’re efficient types, and a balcony overlooking the Caribbean sure is a nice place to write notes!

  8. Kate at 7:21 pm

    Fig – you must do it. It’s never to late. How can you have the time to send invitations, but not the time to send thank yous? Please, listen to Miss Em!!

  9. L at 7:26 pm

    “do me a solid”

    you are the perfect combo of ladylike and rad

  10. Fig at 7:28 pm

    Good question. Maybe I should have just sent the thank-yous WITH the invitations?

    I’m not sure how it all happened, all I know is it was four years ago and I was immature and selfish, and now the lists and cards and memories of who gave me what are all long gone. And I’m a pathetic, loathsome creature. It still keeps me up at night from time to time, no lie.

    You’ve inspired me, though, to write apologetic personal notes to those gift-givers I CAN remember, and to my parents and in-laws. So I think some good came of this painful confession.

  11. Sharon at 7:50 pm

    i stopped sending thank you notes about 2 years ago. i don’t understand the concept behind a thank you note. i simple verbal thank you when the gift is given is enough for me.

  12. Anonymous at 11:19 pm

    Sharon – I only send thank you notes for gifts that I received when the person wasn’t there to see me open it.

    Fig – don’t be too apologetic in your thank you’s and don’t dwell on it. A short, “Sorry for the delay! We really loved the XXXX that you got us.” Thank you notes aren’t about making you feel better, they are to express appreciation for the gifts.

    I’m surprised that you didn’t get swarms of “did you get my gift?” calls. The post-wedding thank you note is the only way that I know the couple got the gift.

    If you registered on-line, odds are good that Macy’s, etc. still has a list of who bought what.

  13. Alicia at 1:48 am

    I will agree that thank-you notes can be sort of cumbersome to write especially when there are lots, however, it’s really nice to get one & it does affirm that the couple have in fact received the gift. My cousin & his wife, whose thank you notes were VERY tardy, had a postcard made of them holding a sign saying ‘thank you’ on their honeymoon. 1) They got the point across very clearly, 2) it was more personal & 3) postcards makes it very easy to keep it brief, saving you time & hand cramps!

  14. Anonymous at 2:59 pm

    I have to admit I’m ashamed that my wedding was 4.5 months ago, and I’m STILL writing thank you notes. But since I’ve sent out over 300, I think I should be somewhat excused….but I’m motivated today to get the last 30 out!!


  15. love.boxes at 3:22 pm

    Someone I admire once wrote, “Gratitude unexpressed is not gratitude.” I agree. And, it doesn’t hurt is the note is a very pretty one too. 🙂

  16. Molly at 2:20 pm

    We gave everyone a picture of us, and them from the wedding, so we had to wait for the photographer to give us our photo CD. It took a little longer than I would have liked, but everyone loved the pictures so much it was worth it.